Tuesday, August 18, 2009

To Get Back With Ex Face Up To Your Mistakes

By Andyl Bergerl

Mistakes do contribute to failures in every relationship. You and even your ex commit some mistakes over the duration of your relationship. So try to accept these mistakes. Mistakes can never be avoided and it is therefore necessary to create preventive measures for it and to make the necessary actions to correct it. Apologies are great ways to make it all up.

If you decide to go back with your ex, both parties must confront the issues that rose from the breakup. Point out several events that you may think that was able to contribute to the break. You may commit more errors from the relationship but we are all human and we make mistakes. It is more important to focus on correcting the mistakes rather than pinning the blame towards each other.

You must sit in a corner and reflect. Try to find the issues that you have faced that have led to the breaking up of your relationship. You must not focus on the errors made by the ex. You need to focus on your errors and how these can be corrected in time.

Whatever mistakes you find in your past behavior, can they be forgiven? Don't be too eager to get down on yourself and believe that your mistakes are basically unforgivable. You would be surprised at the situations that couples find themselves in and that they later recover from. So don't think that your mistakes are beyond forgiveness. There is always hope!

It is important to narrow down the mistakes you've made that led to the breakup. Try to point out what happened during that time of making the mistake so that you need to face the characteristics that have contributed to the breakup. This needs to be done so that you will get back with your ex.

Stress can contribute in making you out of character. Stress can happen from work related issues, family issues and personal issues. Try to see if these stresses are connected in some ways that contributed to the mistakes you made. When you face your ex, try to discuss these stress that may have contributed to the breakup. Explain to your ex thoroughly so that you will be understood.

Sometimes there are personal issues that come when mistakes happen. Being selfish and thoughtless are examples of this. This is rooted with the persons attitude and can only be changed with the persons own initiative. It may take time and effort but effective nonetheless.

You will then come to a point wherein you will gain a new perspective on things and how your mistakes have contributed to the breakup. After gaining this new knowledge, you can call your ex then arrange a meeting. Remember to set the meet somewhere neutral and in public also to make both of you less emotional when dealing with intimate subjects.

When seeing each other, stay focused on the subject. Apologizing helps and also listen to what the ex wants to point out.

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